Sanyu and Me

I have written of the burden placed on my heart for Uganda. Not just the orphans, which are in dire need of intervention, but the women, mothers, fathers, elderly. The terrible situations the people of rural areas in Uganda are unimaginable to say the least!

 I cannot fully understand myself the reasoning of my deep concern for, and desire to help the people of Uganda. I just know it has taken over my purpose of being. I cant get them out of my mind, yet I have never met them.

 I have had my eyes opened by the Lord. He laid down before me what he needed me to see. He showed me stories of children raising children through Richard Stearns, the president of World Vision and author of The Hole In Our Gospel, and Katie Davis the founder of Amazima Ministries and author of Kisses From Katie. I highly recommend these books to you, they will change the way you view your responsibility to the poor forever. They did mine, and I don't ever want to go back.

My life was wrought with heartache, fear, loneliness, and pain. I was shuffling through my days in self-pity. I thought nobody understood all I had gone through.

In 2003 after my husband had attacked me in front of our children, and I dove into deep depression, I found myself in a position where financially, and emotionally I could not care for my children. This was one of the lowest points of my life.

At this point I was completely floundering, lost in my own mind. To top it off, I was told after sending my children to their Aunts house to live while I pulled myself together, that I could only see them under supervised visitations. I was at the end of my rope, I felt like life was over. I had a lady from the Department Of Human Services tell me while I was crying over the phone pleading my case to her, "You need to quit acting like a victim, and start acting like a survivor."

Oh, how angry that comment made me. I stewed on that comment for years. What an imprint in my mind. I was letting the pain control my life. I didn't have Jesus then, those were very dark times. It wasn't until I let Jesus have control of my life that I came into the light of survival. It took the lives and suffering in Uganda to put real perspective of what I had gone through. It took the faces of the orphans to show me the blessings of my own life.

I have woken up to the reason for my own sufferings. I have endured much, which gives me the responsibility to share much. God uses our weaknesses to show his Glory. His Glory is the strength he empowers us with to make it through. He wants us to take these experiences to others, showing and sharing with them how to let God be the master of their lives.

God showed me the sufferings of the world for a reason, he wants me to do something. He wants me to leave my self-pity behind, and focus on the real troubles in the world. I believe this is why he brought me the Sanyu Foundation.

The Foundation is focused on Community intervention, and education. They want the communities to take personal involvement in improving their situations, thereby creating a permanent change rather than a temporary fix. They want long term results. Their vision is so comparable to my own, like a match made in heaven, a divine intervention.

I absolutely love writing the blog for Sanyu Foundation-Uganda. It is challenging, and is the way I feel a connection with Uganda. Financial blocks make it impossible to get to Uganda at this time, but the Lord opened the door for me in the way of technology. I am completely overtaken by this. I want to make the Lord proud he has entrusted this great responsibility in me. When he opens the door to Uganda for me, he  will, and I will go.

Right now my job is to let people know that the Sanyu Foundation exists, it is amazing and doing wondrous things for their communities. They are creating a permanent impact on the terrible statistics of their rural communities. I pray the good Lord makes it possible for me to help get them established for fundraising here in America.

I don't know my true purpose in Uganda at this time, only the Good Lord knows his plan I just want to go and live my life according to the Lord, bringing hope to the poor. May the good Lord guide me in how to proceed according to his will.

I want to follow him and his will not my own. I pray I don't let my worldly ideas influence any decision and let my thoughts be guided by him who knows the way. May he provide the doors and pathways I need to make his will possible and open my eyes to them to see.

I have never felt this passionate about anything in my life, nothing has inspired me, broken me, filled me up, and just simply taken control of me in this manner. Like I said, it is inexplicable to even me in words. It's a feeling, a feeling that covers my entire body. I know through that feeling it is the will of God. What else could it possibly be.

I need a mentor, I pray for a mentor to come into my life that has been there before, to help me on my way. I pray for the possibilities to arise that we may connect. I pray for the good Lord just to show me the way, it's all so technical and confusing. Legal mumbo jumbo. It should not be so hard to just help in the name of Jesus Christ. There are business licenses, permits, IRS forms, 501c3's..La ti da, all a foreign language to me. I know a little bit in a lot of languages, but legal junk is not on my list.

I want to just start my ministry already. I want to figure it all out. I pray God showers me with wisdom, at least guides my fingertips to the right places online. I lay it in your lap Lord God, provide the way I will follow.